If I had to pick a time of year that I miss being in India the most, it would most certainly be during this festival of lights called Diwali. Mostly because festivals are always so much better celebrated with family and friends. But in this particular case, that’s not all I miss.
I miss walking out on my street and watching rows of diyas (oil lamps) adorn the thresholds of all houses; I miss the community celebrations and the fireworks (no, the 4th of July does not invoke the same feeling in me); I miss eating homemade sweets that I did not have to make. ๐ But most of all, I just miss Diwali as I remember it from my childhood – a normal Diwali (as I have come to think of it).
Especially because, ever since we moved to US, Diwali has just never been the same. It’s actually a relatively quiet affair here. More often than not (especially when Diwali day falls on a weekday) the actual day of the festivalย is business as usual, because it’s not a holiday here, and it’s pretty difficult to get time from the daily grind to do anything special.
So then we end up visiting the Hindu temple on the weekend, and organizing a small get-together of sorts with friends (fellow Indians), and sharing desi sweets as well as nostalgic memories of a normal Diwali from our past.
And this has pretty much been the pattern for almost 7 years now. We have watched Diwalis come and go, with 2 predominant thoughts in our minds..
It’s just not the same here, we miss the Diwali of our childhood, and..
How we wish we were home…
But the thing is ย – we areย home. And we have finally realized it. This is our home; the life we chose. For our son who is born here – this is his country, his life, his normal. And I feel like now it is up to us, how we shape that normal, and our failure to do so will have far reaching consequences.
For one, D will grow up with no fond memories of Diwali, and would instead only remember his parents pining for their version of a normal Diwali (whatever that is, he will never know). And what a travesty that would be!
So, we’ve decided enough is enough. We will always have beautiful memories of our childhood Diwali with us, and now it’s time to create something equally beautiful for our son. A different, yet a very normal, very happy Diwali tradition.
Which is why, this year on, we have decided to take off from work on Diwali day, and spend it with family, making homemade sweets and snacks, lighting oil lamps and string of electronic lights as well, and attempting to create a semi decent rangoli on our threshold (semi decent because my craft skills are non-existent).
Small steps, I know, but this is (hopefully) only the beginning of a tradition that we hope to create for our family in our little corner of the world, to keep a slice of India alive in America.
Wishing you all a very Happy Diwali. May the divine light of Diwali shine in your life all through the year and fill your life with happiness and prosperity.
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Shanaya Tales
Thank you so much for the feature, BlogAdda. ๐
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Bellybytes
Home is where the heart is and you make your own traditions. Wish you and your family a happy Diwali
Bellybytes recently posted…My Diwali- a changing celebrationรย
Shanaya Tales
Thank you so much. ๐ Hope you had a great festival season too. ๐
Shanaya Tales recently posted…Liebster Award | 11 Random Facts – 11 Answers – 11 Questions
Bikram
I know exactly how it is in foreign land..
and yes weekends it is .. but to tell you truthfully I find it ridiculous nowadays in india when half the country is celebrating one festival on one day and the other is celebrating it the other day.. how can ONe festival have two dates ๐
Happy Diwali to you and family and Everyone around you
Bikram’s
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Shanaya Tales
Haha Bikram, I know what you mean. Even as I was mourning the loss of a normal Diwali here, my family in India were debating the day of celebration there. ๐
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Obsessivemom
Happy Diwali Shantala. You’re doing good. Diwali here is indeed a special time however what was normal for us isn’t normal for our kids even in India. Things aren’t the same here too. So you can take some tiny bit of consolation from that. Each generation has it’s own ‘normal’. What’s important is that they imbibe the festive spirit of the day.
Obsessivemom recently posted…Stop! Look! Discover!
Shanaya Tales
That is so true, Tulika. As long as they are able to grasp the significance and the spirit of the festival, all is good, I guess. ๐
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Sheethal
Like you the times I miss India is during Diwali and Christmas. Oh! How I miss the lights and sounds and crowd and everything. Yea… but this is the life we chose and happy for that too. Happy Diwali to you and your family. Hope you have a lovely one with your dear ones there. ๐
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Shanaya Tales
Thank you, Sheethal. Wishing you a great festival season too. ๐
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Sundari Venkatraman
It’s not all that different in Mumbai. My childhood Diwali was very different in Madras. We were a huge family and we used to be up with all of us having had our “Ganga Snaan” before 5 am (how we managed with a single bathroom, I don’t know ๐ ). With sweetmeats and crackers and a South Indian lunch spread, it was a different time altogether.
But here in Mumbai, everyone goes to work on Diwali; so I am also sitting in front of the computer today, working. Yeah, Diwali is celebrated today in Tamil Nadu. While we are planning to have the festival lunch tomorrow, when it’s holiday here.
But, somehow over the years, I feel we have lost the spirit of festivals. I believe its a time for connecting with the Maker and sharing with those who don’t have; yeah, and loving animals too. Nothing we do during Diwali seems to keep these in mind. That’s when I began questioning our festivities. Nowadays, I celebrate it the way I believe fit. I buy stuff, share and feed those who don’t have; stopped bursting crackers since a decade. My 2-bit! ๐
(Have I written a whole blog here!!!!!! I hope you don’t mind)
Wish you and your family A VERY HAPPY & SAFE DIWALI!
Shanaya Tales
No I don’t mind. ๐ And that is such a beautiful way of celebrating festivals, Sundari. Kudos to you!
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Parul
You are doing the best you can. And that’s most important. He will remember this version when D grows up. Home is where the heart is. Happy Diwali and have fun! ๐
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Shanaya Tales
That is the goal, Parul. ๐
Thank you so much for your wishes. Wish you and your family a very happy Diwali too. ๐
Shanaya Tales recently posted…Diwali in USA | A normal Diwali, our festivities, and keeping India alive in America
Rachna
I can completely understand what you are saying. You are doing well in sharing the lovely traditions with your son. Wish your family a very Happy Diwali!
Rachna recently posted…5 gifts you must avoid giving this Diwali
Shanaya Tales
Thank you so much, Rachna. Wishing you and your family a great festival season. ๐
Shanaya Tales recently posted…Diwali in USA | A normal Diwali, our festivities, and keeping India alive in America
Laurel Regan
It sounds like you’re building some lovely traditions for your family, and I’ll bet your son looks back on them fondly as his own “normal” Diwali celebrations!
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Shanaya Tales
That is my hope, Laurel. Thank you so much for stopping by. ๐
Shanaya Tales recently posted…Diwali in USA | A normal Diwali, our festivities, and keeping India alive in America
Anamika Agnihotri
I can understand your emotions very well. I went through the same during the 2 Diwalis I celebrated while we lived in UK. While lighting the candles at home and visiting the temple, it did not feel the same as what it felt being in India on this festival. But this year we are in India and I am prepared to make it as close as possible for what it used to be, for Dhruv. Wish you a very Happy Diwali Shantala ๐
Shanaya Tales
Glad you are in India and among family this year for Diwali. I am sure Dhruv will enjoy himself thoroughly. Is it his first Diwali in India?
Shanaya Tales recently posted…Diwali in USA | A normal Diwali, our festivities, and keeping India alive in America
Sid
I guess at the end of the day we can only do what we can to make sure our children know some of the festivals we’ve celebrated. And home truly is where we are ๐ Happy Diwali, Shantala. Of course lots of love to your amazing family too.
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Shanaya Tales
Thank you so much, Sid. Wish you and your family a great festival season too. Wishing you all light and love, always. Safe travels. ๐
Shanaya Tales recently posted…Diwali in USA | A normal Diwali, our festivities, and keeping India alive in America
Roshni
Well said! This is now our home and we need to make the effort to make each Diwali special for our kids! Do post pics later of what you did!
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Shanaya Tales
I sure will, Roshni. ๐
Shanaya Tales recently posted…Diwali in USA | A normal Diwali, our festivities, and keeping India alive in America
Corinne Rodrigues
It’s always hard, I’m sure. I know my uncle and aunt who have been in Australia for over 30 years now try as far as possible to come ‘home’ for Christmas. It’s getting harder for them to do so with grandchildren demanding that they stay ‘home’ for Christmas. I guess that’s the tough part of growing up in one place and moving to another. It’s good that you’re starting traditions of your own.
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Shanaya Tales
Yeah, you have summed up the dilemma perfectly! But since home is wherever we are, we are now focusing on creating our own traditions, rather than lamenting the loss of a ‘normal’ Diwali. ๐
Shanaya Tales recently posted…Diwali in USA | A normal Diwali, our festivities, and keeping India alive in America
Ruchi Singh
Dear Shantala, Wishing you and your family also a Very Very Happy Diwali. I am so glad that you celebrate Diwali on the same day and kudos that you are trying to make memories with your little one. I am sure whenever he would come here on Diwali he would understand and would be able to relate with everything here. Great effort!!
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Shanaya Tales
That is what we are trying to achieve, Ruchi. Even if we are able to recreate a small part of this festival of lights, and do justice to it, I would consider it a success. ๐
Wish you and your family a very happy Diwali too. Wishing you all love, light and happiness in the years to come. ๐
Shanaya Tales recently posted…Diwali in USA | A normal Diwali, our festivities, and keeping India alive in America
Ajay Pai
A real good decision, Shanatala. Wishing you and the entire family a Happy Diwali. The lil one would cherish all such good memories, and this would instill in him the family values.
Loved your decision.
Ajay Pai recently posted…and I strum – A lullaby
Shanaya Tales
Thank you so much, Ajay. Wish you and your family the same. I hope you and your little one are able to get together soon. ๐
Shanaya Tales recently posted…Diwali in USA | A normal Diwali, our festivities, and keeping India alive in America
Debbie D.
Happy Diwali to you and your family! ๐ I think it’s important to keep one’s heritage alive, no matter where you’re living.
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Shanaya Tales
Very true, Debbie. Thank you so much for your wishes. ๐
Shanaya Tales recently posted…Diwali in USA | A normal Diwali, our festivities, and keeping India alive in America
Susan Gourley
Happy Diwali. I think it is important for your son to keep in touch with his heritage. It’s a great thing about America that he can be American and still hold onto ancestral traditions.
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Shanaya Tales
That is correct. America does make it possible to be an American, while still nurturing cultural traditions. I love this place; I just wish our families did not live so far away. ๐
Shanaya Tales recently posted…Diwali in USA | A normal Diwali, our festivities, and keeping India alive in America
Mahathi ramta
Good that you are making every little effort to show your son how Diwali is celebrated. Happy Diwali to you too. Please link your post to my Diwali linky party http://fantastic-feathers.blogspot.in/2015/11/diya-painting-for-diwali.html?m=1
Mahathi ramta recently posted…Deepavali Celebration – A festival of lights
Shanaya Tales
Thank you so much, Ramya. Wish you and your family a very happy Diwali. ๐
Will surely join in the Diwali linky. Thanks for letting me know. ๐
Shanaya Tales recently posted…Diwali in USA | A normal Diwali, our festivities, and keeping India alive in America
Nidhi
Thats such a nice thought Shantala. I totally believe that we shud stop lamenting upon how good it was for us back then and focus on how great we can make it for our kids, now. Love the fact that you have you have taken leave on that day. Even my husband refused a business trip for this week ?
Nidhi recently posted…Orange Infused Gajar Halwa
Shanaya Tales
Yep, it is not like they are going to declare a public holiday in US for Diwali anytime soon, so we can do what we can to re-create the festivities here. ๐
Shanaya Tales recently posted…Diwali in USA | A normal Diwali, our festivities, and keeping India alive in America
Lata Sunil
Shantala, somehow this post is reminding me of the book The Namesake. I guess, some adjustments are required to get the best of both worlds. Happy Diwali.
Shanaya Tales
That is true. There is always a compromise involved; we just have to make the best of what we have.
Wish you a very happy Diwali too. ๐
Shanaya Tales recently posted…Diwali in USA | A normal Diwali, our festivities, and keeping India alive in America