The year was 2005. I was a newly minted Management Graduate. My life ahead looked pretty clear to me – I would pursue my Masters in Finance, and work in the field of Stock Research and Investment Banking. Eventually, I would marry a guy who was settled in my city, Mumbai, as I could not think about ever leaving Mumbai.
Fast forward to 2015. I have since completed my Masters in Finance, and have worked in the field of stock research for 2 years. However, in 2009, I quit my job, and moved to US with my husband – a country where I have work restrictions on my visa. I am far from the city that I loved so much and everything familiar and dear. I have given up on a career that I had always envisioned pursuing, and am now raising a toddler full time.
There were times that I wondered, how my life panned out so different from my plan? I guess, when you choose one end of the stick, you also choose the other. I chose to marry my husband, being aware of the consequences. So, it was simply a result of several such conscious choices that I made, that had my life play out the way it did.
This makes me realize how true the J.K. Rowling quote is – It is indeed our choices that show us who we are, far more than our abilities.
It is very important to understand that we are making choices all the time. Even when we choose not to choose, we have still made a choice. Unless we are willing to take full responsibility for the choices we make, we will always feel like we have no control over our lives. We have been given the power to shape our lives through our choices. If we insist on believing that outside forces are responsible for the situations in our life, we give away all the power we have.
Having said that, it is important for me to add that I do believe in destiny, but only to a certain extent. I feel that when we put a lot of stock in destiny, we undermine the power of human will, and the impact of choices in our lives.
Do you feel that our choices shape our lives? Or, do you feel that destiny plays a bigger role?
*This post is written for the AtoZChallenge.
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Geets
I can relate so much with your posts gal.. the choices.. perspectives.. life..! You’re simply terrific..!!
Keep it up!
Cheers
Geets recently posted…C-Coffin
Shanaya Tales
Thank you so much, Geets. 🙂 I appreciate you visiting daily. Glad to have connected with you. 🙂
Shanaya Tales recently posted…The Power of Choice #AtoZChallenge 2015 @AprilA2Z
Kelly Martin
I feel that life’s flow guides our direction. I feel that we cannot miss an opportunity or experience we are meant to be experiencing. I feel the more we embrace the moment the more our choices come from a place of balance and more harmonious place. We will learn and gain what we came to receive in this life no matter what path we take, life guides us. I have lost count of the amount of times my life has guided me in unexpected ways and my ‘will’ would have taken me down a path that would not have been for my benefit. I don’t so much believe in destiny, but I feel the more we embrace what life gives us with open arms we are in the stream of life and we are directed by our inner choices that may not be what our ego may had in store.
Kelly Martin recently posted…C is for CURIOSITY
Shanaya Tales
Well said, Kelly. Thank you so much for stopping by. 🙂
Shanaya Tales recently posted…The Power of Choice #AtoZChallenge 2015 @AprilA2Z
Shali Jay
Hi Shantala, Great post that sets one thinking. I think a little bit of both- choices and destiny determine what happens in ones life.
I am more inclined to say that destiny / fate or forces that are out of our control heavily influence the choices we make.
Shanaya Tales
I agree. 🙂 It is not that I completely discount the role destiny plays. But, I do feel that we must also take responsibility for the choices that we make. Thanks for stopping by. 🙂
Shanaya Tales recently posted…The Power of Choice #AtoZChallenge 2015 @AprilA2Z
Nibha
Indeed our choices decide where life would take us. No second thoughts about that! Here’s my views about choices I wrote long back: https://nibhz.wordpress.com/2014/04/30/zillion-choices/
and
https://nibhz.wordpress.com/2015/01/17/too-many-choices-or-just-one/
Nibha recently posted…Caged
Shanaya Tales
I will certainly check that one out, Nibha. Thank you so much for stopping by. 🙂
Shanaya Tales recently posted…The Power of Choice #AtoZChallenge 2015 @AprilA2Z
Sanch @ Living my Imperfect Life
I am a big believer in choice. As you rightly said, even not making a decision is a choice. And that will lead us to a particular path. I sometimes reflect on my life and the choices I have made — I don’t think our choices are good or bad — they just are. They take us on this journey called life and teach us lessons along the way. If we hadn’t taken one step, we probably wouldn’t have met people we now know and love, situations we’ve learnt from and well, wouldn’t be who we are!
Sanch @ Living my Imperfect Life recently posted…C is for Cathisophobia #atozchallenge
Shanaya Tales
Sanch, that is such an awesome way to put it *I don’t think our choices are good or bad — they just are. 😀
Shanaya Tales recently posted…The Power of Choice #AtoZChallenge 2015 @AprilA2Z
Prasanna
Do our choices make our destiny or does our destiny make us choose? Who knows? Yes, my life too has shaped differently than what I had imagined a few years back. I gave up my career of 8 years to be at home and give some time for my daughter. I love the HP quote 🙂
Shanaya Tales
Yeah HP quotes rock! 😀 Thanks for visiting, Prasanna. 🙂
Shanaya Tales recently posted…The Power of Choice #AtoZChallenge 2015 @AprilA2Z
Sulekha
We make choices but why we make them is another discussion altogether. There is that saying, ‘Man proposes, God disposes.’ Enjoy your toddler, he will grow up too soon and move away from home to study and work. Best wishes
Shanaya Tales
I agree, Sulekha. I am enjoying motherhood more than I imagined possible. I consider myself lucky to be able to spend such quality time with my little one. 🙂
Shanaya Tales recently posted…The Power of Choice #AtoZChallenge 2015 @AprilA2Z
Diana @ Life in German.
I too think that it is our choices that shape our lives, thanks for sharing your thoughts on the subject!
Diana @ Life in German. recently posted…C is for Cost of living
Shanaya Tales
Thank you for stopping by, Diana. Glad to have you here. 🙂
Shanaya Tales recently posted…The Power of Choice #AtoZChallenge 2015 @AprilA2Z
Aathira
Our choices are responsible for the person we are today- the good, the bad and the ugly. When we make a choice, I think we are sealing our destinies 🙂
Aathira recently posted…C – Cupid
Shanaya Tales
Yeah, I do believe they are connected- our choices and our destines. 🙂 Thank you for sharing your thoughts, Aathira. 🙂
Shanaya Tales recently posted…The Power of Choice #AtoZChallenge 2015 @AprilA2Z
Shilpa Garg
I believe, we truly are the choices we make but in away we are destined to make those choices too. I mean whatever happens, it happens for a reason and it is all written in our destiny!
Shilpa Garg recently posted…C is for Confused #AtoZChallenge @AprilA2Z
Shanaya Tales
That is a nice way to put it, Shilpa. Yes, destiny does shape our choices to some extent. 🙂
Shanaya Tales recently posted…The Power of Choice #AtoZChallenge 2015 @AprilA2Z
Suzy
I believe that destiny and choice work together. That which is destined is bound to occur, how we react to that destiny or the choices we make along the way is of course entirely ours.
Suzy recently posted…Love is in the Air – Consort
Shanaya Tales
Exactly my sentiments, Suzy. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. 🙂
Shanaya Tales recently posted…The Power of Choice #AtoZChallenge 2015 @AprilA2Z
G Angela
I believe it is the choices we make that shapes our lives, when I believe this then I shall take responsibilty of my thoughts, feelings and behaviours… otherwise I may attribute everything to destiny.. despite circumstances and situations, we still have a choice, the freedom to choose… thanks for sharing..
Shanaya Tales
Yes, though somethings might be destined to happen, we do have the power of choice. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Angela. 🙂
Shanaya Tales recently posted…The Power of Choice #AtoZChallenge 2015 @AprilA2Z
Pooja Sharma Rao
Nice piece for introspection.will keep coming back for more of #atozchallenge
Shanaya Tales
Thank you, Pooja. Appreciate it. 🙂
Shanaya Tales recently posted…The Power of Choice #AtoZChallenge 2015 @AprilA2Z
Eloquent Mind
Apt “choice” for C. 😉 See what I did there?
After 8 years of hard work and reaching a senior level, I quit my IT job 2 years ago to focus on motherhood. It wasn’t an easy choice but once taken it has been the best decision so far. 🙂
I believe in both personal choices and destiny. I feel they go hand-in-hand but never overshadow each other for long.
Eloquent Mind recently posted…Clement Love #AtoZChallenge
Shanaya Tales
You put it well, EM. I had to make some difficult choices too, but they were so worth it. I love being able to spend quality time with my son in his infant/toddler years. 🙂
Shanaya Tales recently posted…The Power of Choice #AtoZChallenge 2015 @AprilA2Z
Lata
Choices.. choices everywhere .. but which is the right one? I have been on the other side actually.. Let choices define me. Many times, I couldnt get what I had chosen and worked for. I would then follow whatever had been chosen for me and just hoped its a better choice than what I wanted.
Good post.
Shanaya Tales
Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Lata. Glad to have you here. 🙂
Abbie
ah yes! By ability i may be a superhero but by choice I’m a sidekick
Abbie recently posted…Chapters
Shanaya Tales
That is an interesting choice, Abbie 😀 Thanks for stopping by 🙂
Shanaya Tales recently posted…The Power of Choice #AtoZChallenge 2015 @AprilA2Z
Parul
I loved your post Shantala and I do believe in the choices we make. At the same time, I believe that it is destined that we will make certain choices in life. When I was growing up, I never wanted to go to Delhi. But I studied there and spent 4 years of my life. In those times – same as what you mentioned, 2005 – being in North was India. I never thought life would take me to Bangalore. It’s 10 years now and I cannot imagine living in any other city. And those were just a few choices..There were so many more 🙂
Parul recently posted…C for Change
Shanaya Tales
Yes I agree, Parul. Sometimes we are destined to make certain choices. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Always a pleasure to have you here. 🙂
Shanaya Tales recently posted…The Power of Choice #AtoZChallenge 2015 @AprilA2Z
Mee Magnum
Shantala, I believe that everything happens for a reason. I know you have a great husband. And I’m sure a wonderful child. I can tell you’re grateful for everything you have. And more good things will come your way.
Mee (The Chinese Quest)
Mee Magnum recently posted…“B” is for BYOB (Bring Your Own Bottle) #AtoZChallenge @AprilA2Z
Shanaya Tales
You got that right. 🙂 Though I had different plans for my life, I would not change one bit of it now. I am married to a great guy and consider myself lucky to be able to spend such quality time with my son during his infant/toddler years. Thank you so much for stopping by, Mee. 🙂
Shanaya Tales recently posted…The Power of Choice #AtoZChallenge 2015 @AprilA2Z
Swathi Shenoy
I love to believe that everything that happens is a consequence of our choice. Sure, destiny has its role but even though, wasn’t it our choice in the first place to become who we are? Nice post Shantala 🙂
Swathi Shenoy recently posted…Crux
Shanaya Tales
Agree completely, Swathi. 🙂 Thanks for stopping by. Always a pleasure to have you here. 🙂
Shanaya Tales recently posted…The Power of Choice #AtoZChallenge 2015 @AprilA2Z
Elizabeth Mueller
Holy cow! Has no one posted any comments on your blog yet, or are you moderating them? If they haven’t, I should let loose the frog rain to plague everyone for NOT commenting! I love your deep thinking. ((HUGS)) That quote is so mind-digging if I do say so myself.
It is the choices we make that shapes our lives, destiny is not preset because every human being has the gift of free will and nothing is locked in place–unless it is God’s will.
Guess what? I, too, am raising an adorable toddler full time along with adorable teenagers and one feisty yet adorable 9 year old. Boy, I wish time didn’t flee! 🙁
Elizabeth Mueller
AtoZ 2015
My Little Pony
Shanaya Tales
Thank you so much for your kind words, Elizabeth. It means a lot to me. 🙂 I am so glad that you enjoyed the post. Good to have connected with you through AtoZ. I am totally enjoying your theme for AtoZ. I look forward to guessing the names of the ponies and in the process am learning the most unique names for flowers. 🙂
Shanaya Tales recently posted…The Power of Choice #AtoZChallenge 2015 @AprilA2Z